Jokes Head

You might be a Floridian if...

You might be a Floridian if:

You exhibit a slight twitch when introduced to anyone with the first names of Charley, Frances, Ivan or Jeanne.

Your freezer never has more than $20 worth of food in it any given time.

You're looking at paint swatches for the plywood on your windows, to accent the house color.

You think of your hall closet/saferoom as "cozy"

Your pool is more accurately described as "framed in" than "screened in".

Your freezer in the garage now only has homemade ice in it

You no longer worry about relatives visiting during the summer months

You too haven't heard back from the insurance adjuster

You now understand what that little "2% hurricane deductible" phrase really means

You're putting a collage together on your driveway of roof shingles from your neighborhood

You were once proud of your 16" electric chain saw

Your Street has more than 3 " NO WAKE" signs posted

You now own 5 large ice chests

Your parrot can now say" hammered, pounded and hunker down"

You recognize people in line at the free ice, gas and plywood locations

You stop what you're doing and clap and wave when you see a convoy of power company trucks come down your street

You're depressed when they don't stop

You have the personal cell phone numbers of the managers for: plywood, roofing supplies and generators at Home Depot on your speed dialer

You've spent more than $20 on "Tall white kitchen bags" to make your own sand bags

You're considering upgrading from a 16" to a 20" chainsaw

You know what "Bar chain oil" is

You're thinking of getting your wife the hardhat with the ear protector, face shield for Christmas

You now think the $6000 whole house generator seems reasonable

You look forward to discussions about the merits of "cubed, block and dry ice"

Your therapist refers to your condition as "generator envy"

You fight the urge to put on your winter coat and wool cap and parade around in front of your picture window, when you finally get power restored and your neighbor across the street, with the noisy generator doesn't.

You're thinking of shaving your head and getting a black Gor-Tex rain suit, like Jim Cantore has and so is your husband

You ask your sister up north to start saving the Sunday Real Estate classifieds